I observed how many times during the day I would usually eat or just snack on something small and tasty. And I discovered it was many times, often in fact. Of course, it’s not just me this is a very common habit.

The habit is to satisfy ourselves, to simply feel full and happier. The food often becomes a substitution for love and it suppress all those feelings of loneliness or unhappiness or other negative emotions. It is like an instant satisfaction and, as with all instant things, it doesn’t sustain you for long and the need soon comes back.

I have studied and experimented with different kinds of eating styles for four years. There are many alternatives, for example: macrobiotic, vegetarian, vitarian, vegan and paleo diets. In the end I discovered it’s not about the latest dieting fads and fashions, it’s about creating your own eating style. I observed what food my digestive tract liked and what felt wrong. And then I simply created a list of foods that go down well with me.

The second bad habit we tend to have is eating too much, probably three times more than we naturally need. My problems came from simply eating more than my digestive system was able to process. To be honest, I don’t believe in eating little portions every three hours, as many diets advise. That is not enough time to digest. The fact is one nutritionally balanced meal a day would completely be enough. But, as I said, everyone has to find their way.

We should also ask: what is real hunger? And separate it from sexual hunger, hunger for love or company. Try to find the real desire that’s covered by hunger. People sometimes confuse an inner desire for love or other needs and instead choose an easier way to fulfill that urge – by eating food.

Because the body is our temple, we shouldn’t put anything in our mouths before thinking twice about it. We should be very picky about what we eat, with full awareness of how certain foods affect us. Don’t let the food control you.

I guess eating to cover some other issue is a big thing for many people, because every day I see overweight people. And sometimes when I observe them eating, it appears they’re not really loving or savoring the food they eat. I’ve found myself eating in this way many times, that’s why I know how it feels. It’s like you don’t care whether you’re eating caviar or dry bread.

How ever it is for you, I want you to know that this is not about judgment but only about facing the actual situation in terms of your eating style. With the omnipresent temptations of fast foods, for example, the media certainly doesn’t make it easier for us.

But I say we always have a choice. And that’s why I worship and am thankful for the food I eat. With the knowledge that what I put inside will show up on the outside, too, I choose the portions that best respects my digestion rhythms.

The body is the physical aspect of our being. For this life is this body. The chance is here and now. It’s your chance to feel the joy from finding your own way and your own style.

So go for it, experiment, try new things and let me know in the comments what you find out.

Let us rejoice in our bodies!

If only parents would teach kids about real love, instead of dealing with their own troubles and struggling to express unconditional love towards their children and each other. If only the Internet would show us how to talk openly and touch each other properly, instead of meaningless hardcore porn with the main goal of penetration. Then we would have such a different idea of what normal is.

For many people penetration is the goal. But is that what we really want? What if what we consider as normal is only what most people usually do, and there is much more healthy and fulfilling way?

Once a person feels how it is to be completely present in any intimate meeting (and feels two minds open wide), it’s so intensely awesome it may even become a little bit frightening. That meeting can be very physical, penetration included, and highly energized. But also it can be not physical at all. Where you have a deep connection through the eyes, honestly sharing all your emotions with your partner. After this experience you start to change your mind and attitude towards sex.

Let’s be clear, I’m not saying I don’t like sex. I’m saying the foundation should be a loving connection. That connection is like a full body heat that appears and warms up my head as well as all parts of my body. That universal trust and love is penetrating my body. Tears appear in my eyes, even if I don’t feel sad. It’s just my soul that needs a little cleansing and it happens to me via tears. My body trembles all over and I long to share more of my essence. You suddenly feel complete and high.

These are some of the states that people may feel when they touch something deep inside. The only way to connect with someone is first to connect with yourself, that’s why it can be scary. You probably know this situation from your life, like when you meet someone whom you can be open with and it gets intense. Your heart is opening and you feel in love. It may come in up to a point and then you take a step back and shut down again. That’s the fear of our inner demons. We protect ourselves so we don’t have to meet them.

It is in our depths where the angels and demons reside. As we dive there we can choose to meet them and discover what they are like, because Jing and Jang, our two different poles, will always be there. And the demon is not always as scary as you imagine him. When you have the courage to face the dark side you’re soon rewarded by meeting the light parts of yourself.

I feel any intimate meeting is like a dance, I’m listening to my body, to my feelings and opening up to be aware of anything that’s real for me at the present moment.

When in a state of full awareness I can share with my intimate partner things I’m willing to share. Instead of saying ‘give me more’, I can say ‘thank you for what you’re sharing with me’ – that’s already the big gift. It can be less than we want but that’s the risk. It’s about letting go of any agenda or plan and simply being in the reality of the moment. And receiving the best we’re able to.

And at other times you may get much more than you expected, finding that beautiful place where you can both meet. And it’s like suddenly there is only one melody, not two any more, for as long you allow it last.

This is encouragement for you to find out what is natural for you. What is your way to meet someone? Are there any patterns to be changed? If you want to, please feel free to share your personal experiences in the comments.

Tantra is one of the ways to learn more about this topic. If you are interested about the sessions we offer visit please our menu at hegre.com/tantra

Do you have positive habits that contribute to your good health and comfort? Or are the things you do more or less done unconsciously, and perhaps you think are not ideal? Think for a second about what habits make up your life. Be honest with yourself. We are human and each one of us has vices. I don’t judge because I have vices too.

But I would like to focus on the things that make you feel good and contribute to your better health – the things that lift you up when you feel low. There is actually a deeper meaning to the phrase ‘feeling low’. It means low energy, a slow vibration. Something unpleasant happens during the day and you may feel like it took all your energy. In fact, that something is just slowing down your vibrations and you can choose to raise them up again. You can consciously let go of it and change the vibes.

That’s why I call it a ritual. Anything we do with awareness can be considered as a ritual, or a meditation if you like. Ideally, we have a few of those that we do every day and it prevents us from encountering difficult situations, or facing them more easily. Please note: I don’t find smoking, over eating, taking drugs etc. as a ritual, I see these more as an escape than anything else.

So what can it be? First of all I think about moving the body according to your preference. There are many other factors that influence our mood a lot; like eating patterns, the people you meet, the music you listen to, your surroundings, your medical conditions, your job and so on.

You may find something that could be replaced and improved. You can easily uncover the habits that don’t serve you well. And most probably you know what they are.

And then it is about finding something that you like, something that comforts and indulges you. It has to be something that comes out of your being and brings a smile to your face again. Than you will feel high on life.

Once you find your thing, you’ll know that your emotions are not necessarily your boss and that you’re not committed to feeling low for the rest of the day.
In other words: hold the rudder and go where you want. Replace those old bad habits with new, fresh ones.

I recommend starting with little things, before you quit your job for example. It could be a nice long walk in nature, creating space for your favorite activities, calling friends more often, eating healthier food, drawing, singing, receiving or giving massages, spending more time with your children and so on.

Elevate this routine into a beautiful ritual or meditation. At the beginning choose just one thing and gradually you can add new ones. Do it as often as you want to and make sure you’re conscious when doing it. With your awareness you send love at the same time and the love you give will return back to you.

I hope this will inspire you. And if you have any related comments or questions, please do leave a comment.